Good morning all.
Have you ever started something, that you new you were going to be great at, to find yourself questioning your ability at every turn? Let me tell you, I certainly have. I went to school and studied business, law and society, and even threw a bit of forensic science in the mix. My passion though, has always been writing. From the time I could write words, I have been writing poetry or short stories. My mind has always been an endless story playing out that needed to be written down. So, when I graduated college and was figuring out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life, I naturally gravitated to writing. I love to write and doing it daily is an absolute joy. And well, getting paid for it is even better. So, why do I have so many days where I feel like I am failing at the one thing I am passionate about?
This question haunted me daily. I had many conversations with other writers who said they felt much the same. I have recently discovered that the issue isn’t whether I am good enough to be a writer, it is whether I believe in myself enough to be a writer. And it took a fabulous writing coach to get me to this place. I am now a firm believer that every writer needs a coach. Here are my reasons for believing this and the help I find through my coaching sessions with Gabriela.
Finding Your Value
When I first started speaking with Gabriela, I felt like I was drowning in a sea of demands and had very little time for myself. In our very first session, she helped me to visualize what it is I truly wanted for and from my writing.
I think many writers find themselves stuck in a place where they don’t see very much advancement towards their perceived goals, and therefore begin to question the significance of their value as writers.
The problem with this type of thinking is that it keeps you circling in the same space and halts all forward movement. When I was here, I began to dread getting up in the morning and writing. It wasn’t because I had lost my love for writing or my creative voice. It was because I let myself fall into this cycle of others did not support me so why should I support myself.
By finding my voice and learning techniques to reconnect myself with my creative side, I have found the joy of writing again. I have returned to the little girl who always has a notepad ready to write those amazing thoughts that occur at the most inopportune moments.
Make Your Schedule
Another aspect of my writing process that was keeping me in the circle of self doubt was my schedule. I always planned my writing around every one else’s schedule. I would write for my job, take care of my children, clean the house, take care of the children some more and then it was time for bed. I either stayed up late and paid the price the next day, to do my own writing, or worse yet, it got pushed off to the next day.
In this way, I was never finding time to write, and the few moments I squeezed in before falling asleep left me feeling like I was failing all together. By stepping back and visualizing what I wanted from my writing, I found that I wanted to write my stories more than anything else in the world. So, how could I make time for me and my writing? I had to make a new schedule and make my time as valuable as every one else’s.
In this way, I have found time to take care of all of my daily tasks and have enough time for me to write for myself, as well. I no longer dread starting my day. I look forward to what each day has in store and use my daily activities to fuel my personal writing goals.
Renewing Your Friendship With Creativity
Now that I had found my schedule it was time to reconnect with the part of me I had shoved in the corner for a while. My personal creativity. My coach made the analogy of a best friend you have been distant from for a while. Though you have not spoken regularly in a bit, they are still there ready to pick up where you last left off.
This is what I needed to do with my creativity. I had to reconnect and learn to make time to spend with this part of me daily. Even if it was a short amount of time. And believe me when I say it was short. The first few days of this new schedule were only about 15 minutes at a time. But they were the most creative 15 minutes I had spent in months.
So, what did I learn from this? I learned that taking time for my writing and for my personal goals was okay and very necessary. I also learned that through this process I valued my own work much more. While I still value the views and opinions of others in my work, I no longer require positive feedback to feel like I am accomplishing my goal. After all, it is my goal, not that of every one I was seeking approval from before.
To close out this post, I would like to say thank you to my fabulous coach Gabriela Blandy. You have helped me through so many tough times. Though I do not always get to connect live, your videos have been a God send and I look forward to them every week. Thank you for all that you do.
I wish all of you a marvelous week and may this new year and new decade find you fulfilling all of your dreams and goals. As always, inspire to be inspired, and never stop connecting with your inner creative.