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  • Achieving,  family,  Inspiration,  learning,  parenting,  world

    How to Deal With Your Childs Tantrum

    Good afternoon all. I hope you are having a fabulous weekend so far and staying warm. Today I have decided to talk a bit about parenting and the issue of the dreaded tantrum. I am sure many of you can relate with this topic. You know that fit that starts with mommy can I have and ends with your child screaming at the top of their lungs.

    As a mother of six I have learned to deal with this tantrum rather well. Not that it makes them any easier but thus is life when you have children. I have learned some patterns to avoid and some easy tips to help ward off these fits that leave one looking for an escape. Here is what I have discovered.

    1. Make sure your child is well rested before trying to venture to any store.
    2. Distractions are an easy decoy.
    3. Stay strong it will pass.
    4. Do not worry about what others think.
    5. If all else fails, leave your child at home with dad.

    Okay, so step 1 is the ideal option for any trip. You all know that a rested child is a happy child. If you know you have to go to the store, try to schedule it around your child’s normal nap time. After being the optimal time. As any parent knows this is not always possible. Enter step two.

    Having a distraction for your child helps to keep their minds occupied. Children often throw a fit because they are bored. With boredom comes the need for attention or something to occupy their time. Try taking a favorite toy or book with you when ever you travel to the store. Do not give the item to your child until you see that the tantrum is inevitable. Let them look and be involved with your shopping trip and then pull the toy out at the needed time. Giving your child the toy to begin with will only cause them to get bored with that toy and look for new distractions. Then guess what, in comes the tantrum. So having a backup distraction is always a smart idea.

    There will be times when every distraction in the world just does not work. When this happens and the screams start, you want to crawl in a hole and never come out. Do not give up though. This will pass. Sometimes you just need to let them scream it out. I know this is not what you want to hear when you are standing in a store full of people who are now staring at you. Enter step four. Do not worry about what others think. While you may at the moment feel like the worst parent in the world you are doing what is best for your child. When your child is throwing a fit he/she is asking for validation to their claims of necessity. If you give in and give them what they want to avoid the criticism of bystanders, you will be failing your child. Let them scream. Just keep going through your shopping list and ignore the tantrum they are unleashing. This will accomplish two things. You will be teaching your child that what they are crying for is not something they need and you will be teaching them that screaming is not a way to get their voice heard. Thereby teaching them that next time (and yes there will be a next time) they want something, screaming will not work. After you have done this for a while your child will learn that tantrums do not serve a purpose and they will have fewer and fewer.

    I hope this helps at least someone out there. While I will not say that any of these steps are easy, they are doable. They will not always work but they will help. Never give up and just keep doing what is best for your child. In the end you will have a few more grey hairs and a better relationship with your child.

    Have a wonderful weekend my friends. Inspire to be inspired and keep your dreams alive always.

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  • family,  future,  Inspiration,  Military,  parenting,  remembering,  Sacrifice,  Thank you,  world

    Thank You: You Are A Hero

    Good afternoon all. Today I would like to take the time to thank all those who serve in the military. No matter where you are from or what military you serve in, THANK YOU.

    I was sitting with my son, scrolling through Facebook when I saw a video of returning soldiers. Needless to say, I was in tears and my 3-year-old was asking me what was wrong. I did not know how to explain it to him. So, I sat and thought about it. I tried to come up with a way to explain to my child why I was crying. Well as it normally does, this line of thought brought me to other thoughts. Like how would you tell a child that their mommy or daddy will not be home for a few weeks, months, or even years? Now here I am. After my tear-filled realization brought on by a Facebook post.

    I felt the need to say thank you to all of the men and women who leave their homes and serve to protect others from the monstrosities that are in the world. Thank you to the men and women who stay at home and keep children, pets and family members safe while their loved ones serve a higher purpose. Thank you to the children who wait patiently for mom or dad to come home from service to share a little time with them. To all of you, thank you. You are all heroes.

    Now, I have thought of soldiers and their sacrifice on many occasions. I think of the time they spend away from their families so that I may tuck my children into bed at night. I have also thought of the men and women who are here at home and keep things going until their soldier comes home. What I had not really thought about was the children who wait for their soldiers to come home. Wait, let me clarify that. I have thought about them, I have just never sat down and thought of the emotional and mental strain this must put on those waiting at home. I have considered the soldiers and all of their stresses and longings to be home and their spouses stress waiting for them. I just had never really visualized what these children go through. Having parents absent for important events in life is hard enough. Having them absent because they are defending the world is entirely different.

    I sat and imagined what it would be like to talk to my children weekly through a computer or phone screen. I thought about the feelings my children would have if their daddy wasn’t home every night for dinner. I thought about how my children would feel if I was not here to tuck them in at night. This made my heart hurt so much. I realized how big of heroes these children are as well as their soldier loved ones. For that reason, I say thank you to them the most. Thank you for giving up all of the things we take for granted so that our families can be protected. You are the biggest heroes of them all.

    I hope that you all can take a minute out of your busy day to say thank you to someone who is waiting for their soldier to come home.

    On behalf of my family, I say thank you to the soldiers serving in the military and sacrificing, I say thank you to the family members left at home, and I say a humongous thank you to the children who are waiting on their soldiers to return to tuck them in at night. You are all appreciated and we send you hugs and inspiration.

    As always, my friends inspire to be inspired and do not just follow your dreams, grab them by the horns and give them wings.

  • Achieving,  apllications,  change,  future,  Inspiration,  learning,  rejection,  work

    Surviving The Dreaded “We Decided to go in Another Direction”

    You hype yourself up, pour your heart out into your portfolio and know you have what it takes to get the job. You turn in your application and wait…..Finally you receive a response. “Thank you for your time but we have decided to go in another direction.”

    Let’s face it, this is a companies polite way of saying you did not have what they were looking for. With all of the demands for political correctness and not hurting feelings, this is what a rejection letter has come down to. The funny thing about these types of rejections is that I would rather not work for a company that is going to turn their business around and go in a different path, rather than hire me.

    Okay, let’s be serious, this type of rejection while it stings is hurting future generations more than it is helping. I understand not wanting to hurt feelings and not wanting to cause problems, but who does this help. If you are going to turn someone down, it is better that you tell them why. After all, how is someone supposed to improve what they do not know is wrong?

    While the sting of that rejection letter or call hurts, you need to use it to figure out what went wrong. Think about the interview process and use the rejection, (because we all know that is what it is) to your benefit. Figure out which part of your presentation was off and make it better next time. Polish your resume, rehearse your answers to questions that will be asked, and do some research into what your prospective employer is looking for. It is easy to say, “I just wasn’t right for the job.” When what you need to be doing is asking “Why was I not right for the job?” So next time you can make changes and wow your way to where you want to be.

    While it is easy to get discouraged by these set backs, if you use them to better yourself, then they serve a purpose. It is time to take another approach to rejection letters. They are not saying you are not a good candidate, you just were not the perfect candidate. That is what companies are looking for in today’s highly competitive markets. The only problem is, they never quite explain what that is. So ask. If you do not ask the person writing the note, then ask other professionals like them. Find a friend who works in that field or a mentor in the same business, or use the resources at your disposal. This is the age when “Google” knows all. Ask the questions, because unless you know where you are going wrong you will never be able to go right.

    Leave the other direction behind you and always keep moving forward. Your perfect position is out there, you just need to be ready to go and get it.